By Bonita Wilborn
I know the bible teaches us not to envy what others have, but as humans, it is hard not to exercise a little envy from time to time. The danger is when we go overboard with that little bit of envy, and it becomes lust or greed.
In my lifetime, I have typically not been given to envy of others, as God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve, and I am very thankful to him for everything I have. Still, there has been the occasional moment of weakness when I think, “Wow, I sure would like to have a ring like that.” Or “That is a beautiful outfit. I wish I could fit into it.”
But what I’d like to address at the moment is things I am NOT envious of.
I was sitting in a restaurant yesterday with my coworker, and two women came in who were seated next to us. Let me just say one of those women was very pregnant. She looked to be all of 5 feet tall and seemed to be struggling to breathe.
I remember that feeling, and I was not the least bit envious of her. I love my daughter as much as a mother can love a child, and I have always loved babies, but after 38 years of not being pregnant, I am perfectly satisfied to continue in that condition.
I personally know of some families that have multiple children. I know of several families with four or five children. I know one family that has seven children. I myself came from a family of six children, and my mother is number eight of fifteen children that were born to her father. So please know that I am not being disrespectful of large families in any way, but it just wasn’t in the cards for me. It is almost inevitable that sibling rivalries are going to exist in large families. It’s just the nature of the beast.
One day, when Jennifer was in the first grade, she came home telling me about several classmates who had younger siblings or were about to have younger siblings. She asked, “Momma, why don’t I have brothers or sisters? Do preachers not believe in having more than one kid?” You can imagine my surprise since she had never before mentioned the desire to have a sibling. That day, however, she was very interested in it. Ricky and I had already decided that our family was complete, so I began scrambling for something to say that would appease her. “Jennifer, if you had a little brother or sister, you’d have to share your toys with them.” She answered, “That’s OK.” “If you had a little brother or sister, you’d have to share your bedroom with them.” She said, “I wouldn’t care to share my room.”
Then God gave me the perfect words. “Jennifer, if you had a little brother or sister, you’d have to share your Momma and Daddy with them.” Her eyes blared, and she declared, “NO! I ain’t having no little brother or sister!” Suddenly her envious desire for a sibling, such as her friends had, turned into something that was nothing resembling envy, and it never returned. Whew!
I’ve never been the sort of person that harbors a desire for a particular make or model of vehicle. So, it doesn’t bother me when I see someone else driving a Mercedes or a Lincoln. I just know that if I had that kind of vehicle, I would also have a huge monthly payment to go with it. So I’m not the least bit envious of someone driving those vehicles.
As one who has driven vehicles in the past that didn’t always get me to where I wanted to go and get me back home again, I’m fine with my Chevy Equinox. Yes, I still have a monthly payment to keep up with, but it is a payment that I can afford to make, and my vehicle gets me to where I’m going, and it is dependable enough to get me back home again. And even if it doesn’t get me back home today, with a little repair, it should be good to go tomorrow. Simply put, as far as I know, my vehicle isn’t falling apart to the point of undependability. When it reaches that point, I’ll look for another vehicle that is more dependable.
Likewise, I drive by fine houses that make my little house seem like a cabin and their house seem like a mansion, but there again; I can only imagine the payment they surely must have to give the bank every month.
For me, the thing about having a huge house on a vast piece of property is that if I owned that, I would also want a housekeeping crew to help me keep the house clean and the laundry done, and I imagine I’d want a lawn care crew to help keep the grounds maintained. With all that, I might decide I also wanted a kitchen crew to cook my meals and a chauffeur to drive me everywhere I wanted to go.
So you see, envy is not for the faint of heart. The more envy you have, the more envy you get.