Just Leave Me Alone
Growing up with three sisters and one brother in a very small house meant having people around a lot. I realized early on that finding “alone time” was important. I was the only one who had my own bedroom. I was the only one who stayed up late watching old movies until the networks went off the air. And I spent a lot of time wandering through the woods just to be by myself.
Throughout school I never joined any club or group that wasn’t about constant competition. I played baseball, football, and was on the math team, but those were all about competing. I thought of joining organizations like the Boy Scouts, the 4H Club, the Debate Team, Model United Nations, and Future Farmers of America, but I never felt comfortable with things like that.
As I became an adult, this continued. I’ve never joined or wanted to join any clubs like Kiwanis, Shriners, Masons, Moose Lodge, or even the Esquire Club that Barney wanted so desperately to join after he and Andy rode up to the state capital to meet with them. I know these clubs do great work with their communities, but they’re not for me.
I was once offered a membership with the Mensa Society. I took the test simply because I love taking tests that are based on math. I even went as far as attending one meeting and sat there trying to keep my eyes open as various members took turns at the podium to offer philosophical ramblings on how to save Planet Earth. I never went back. They had some great snacks though.
My ex-wife was continually joining organizations from “Save the Whales” and “Pollution Awareness,” to “Milwaukee Mexicans for the Metric System.” Okay, I invented that last one. I would always drive her to meetings and go back to pick her up, but had to explain many times that I had no desire to get involved. I’m a people person and enjoy people, just not in that environment.
I don’t know the reason I’m so uncomfortable in these situations. Maybe it goes all the way back to my childhood and desperately trying to get a little time away from the crowd. Maybe it’s simply because I’m a Leo and only care for events about Neal. That’s probably why I enjoy performing comedy because everyone’s focus is on me, where it should be.
I just know as I get older, being so set in my ways against belonging is taking its toll. I might have to start a club called “Lonesome Old Fools With Nothing To Do.” Of course, just because I start it doesn’t mean I’m going to join.